Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

The artist tried to concentrate on his work, but the attraction he felt for his model finally became irresistible.  He threw down his palette, took her in his arms and kissed her.

She pushed him away.  "Maybe your other models let you kiss them," she said.

"I've never tried to kiss a model before," he swore.

"Really," she said, softening.  "How many models have there been?"

"Four," he replied.  "A jug, two apples, and a vase."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

 "How was your blind date?" a college student asked her roommate.

"Terrible!" the roommate answered.  "He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce."

"Wow!  That's a very expensive car.  What's so bad about that?"

"He was the original owner!"

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

A man walks into a Bank, gets in line, and when it was his turn, he pulls out a gun . . . and robs the Bank! . . . But just to make sure he leaves no witnesses . . . He turns around and asks the next customer in line, "Did you see me rob this Bank?"

The customer replies, "YES."

The bank robber raises his gun, points it at the guy's head, and BANG!!!!!  ---shoots him in the head and kills him!

He quickly moves to the next customer in line and says to the man . . . "DID . . . YOU . . . SEE . . . ME . . . ROB THIS BANK?

The man calmly responds . . . "No . . . But my wife did!"

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

TEACHER:  Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD:  HIJKLMNO.

TEACHER:  What are you talking about?

DONALD:  Well, yesterday you said it was H to O.

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

Barry took a girl out on her first date.  When they pulled off into a secluded area around midnight, the girl said, "My mother told me to say no to everything."

"Well," Barry said, "do you mind if I put my arm around you?"

"No," the girl replied.

"Do you mind if I put my other hand on your leg?"

"N-n-no," the girl replied.

"You know," Barry said, "We're going to have a lotta fun if you're on the level about this."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

ATTORNEY:  This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

WITNESS:  Yes.

ATTORNEY:  And in what ways does it affect your memory?

WITNESS:  I forget.

ATTORNEY:  You forget?  Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

A man enters a full elevator and shouts, "Ballroom please."

A lady standing in front of him turns around and says, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was crowding you."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized.  She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.  The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.

Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen.  I call the police for help, and what do they do?  They send me a BLIND policeman."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

A University of Georgia student was visiting a Yankee relative in Boston over the holidays.  He went to a large party and met a pretty co-ed.  He was attempting to start up a conversation with the line, "Where do ya'll go to school?"

The co-ed, of course, was not overly impressed with his grammar or southern drawl, but answered his question, "Yale."

The Georgia student took a big, deep, breath and shouted, "WHERE DO YA'LL GO TO SCHOOL?"

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

ATTORNEY:  ALL your responses MUST be oral, okay?  What school did you go to?

WITNESS:  Oral.

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

When I joined the military it was illegal to be homosexual, then it became optional.  I'm getting out before it becomes mandatory.  ---Anonymous Military Personnel

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

A little girl had just finished her first week of school.  "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother.  "I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!"

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved.  She was stark naked!

As I was reeling from the shock, I heard by five-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom!  That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.

MARIA: Here it is.

TEACHER: Correct.  Now class, who discovered America?

CLASS: Maria.

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?"

Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough."

The little girl thought about it for a few moments then asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

A young lawyer was defending a wealthy businessman in a complicated lawsuit.  Unfortunately, the evidence was against his client, and he feared the worst.  So the lawyer asked the senior partner of the law firm if it would be appropriate to send the judge a box of Havana cigars.

The partner was horrified.  "The judge is an honorable man," the partner exclaimed.  "If you do that, I can guarantee you will lose the case!"

Weeks later, the judge ruled in favor of the lawyer's client.  The partner took him to lunch to congratulate him.  "Aren't you glad yo didn't send those cigars to the judge?" the partner asked.

"But I did send them," replied the lawyer.  "I just enclosed the plaintiff's lawyer's business card!"

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

A college student goes to the school therapist.  During the
session, the therapist asks, "How is your sex life?"

The college student replies, "I have a lot of issues with sex."

The therapist asks again, "What kind of issues?"

The college student again replies, "Oh, mostly Hustler and Penthouse."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

A man had an accident and called the police on his cell phone.

The police asked, "Where is the location of your accident?"

The man replied, "Approximately near milepost 499."

The police asked again, "Where is milepost 499?"

The man replied again, "Probably between milepost 498 and 500."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

There was an old college professor who started every class with
a vulgar joke.

After one particularly nasty example, the women in the class decided to walk
out the next time he started.

The professor got wind of their plot, so the next morning he walked in and
said, "Good morning, class.  Did you hear about the shortage of whores
in India?"

With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.

"Wait ladies," cried the professor.  "The boat doesn't leave until Thursday."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010

Friday's Laugh . . . And Then Some!

Wife standing in front of a mirror and telling to her
husband, "I am fat, old, wrinkled, and no longer pretty.  Will you
still give me a romantic compliment?"

Husband replies: "Your eyesight is still excellent."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet

From our upcoming book compiled by Richard L. Weaver II
Laugh is setup with just over 4 jokes a day, all 365 days, and can be read in any order!
Expected Release Date: Fall 2010