LAUGH . . . And Then Some!

A science teacher was talking to the first grade about whales when a little girl asked a question. Little Girl: "Do whales swallow people?"

Science Teacher: "Even though they are much bigger than us, they have throat pleats that filter food..

Little Girl: "But Mrs. Watson says Nicola was swallowed by a huge whale."
   
Angry Science Teacher: "Blue whales can’t swallow people."

 Little Girl: "Well, when I get to heaven I'll just ask Nicola if he was really swallowed by a whale."

Even Angrier Science Teacher: "What if Nicola went to hell?"

Little Girl: "Well, then you can ask him yourself!.

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet, Volume 2

From Day #35 in a second complete manuscript compiled by Richard L. Weaver II

LAUGH . . . And Then Some!

Two men stumble out of a bar and begin to walk down the street, when they see a dog happily licking itself.. One man says, "Man, I wish I could do that." to which the other man replies, "Maybe you should pet him first..."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet, Volume 2

From Day #31 in a second complete manuscript compiled by Richard L. Weaver II

LAUGH . . . And Then Some!

A research scientist dropped a piece of buttered toast on the floor and was amazed to see that it landed butter-side up, thereby disproving the long-held theory that toast always lands butter-side down. Thinking that he might have made an important breakthrough that could lead to the rewriting of science textbooks, he took the slice of toast to a colleague for his observations.

"How could it be that when I dropped this slice of toast, it landed butter-side up when all previous knowledge suggests that the opposite should have occurred?"

"It's easy," said the colleague. "You must have buttered the wrong side."   

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet, Volume 2

From Day #26 in a second complete manuscript compiled by Richard L. Weaver II

LAUGH . . . And Then Some!

A woman was waiting in the checkout line at a shopping center. Her arms were heavily laden with a mop, a broom, and other cleaning supplies. By her actions and deep sighs, it was obvious she was in a hurry and not happy about the slowness of the line.
 
When the cashier called for a price check on a box of soap, the woman remarked indignantly, "Well, I'll be lucky to get out of here and home before Christmas!"
 
"Don't worry, ma'am," replied the clerk. "With that wind kicking up out there and that brand new broom you have there, you'll be home in no time."

Laugh Like There's No Tomorrow: Over 2,000 jokes from the Internet, Volume 2

From Day #25 in a second complete manuscript compiled by Richard L. Weaver II